sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize