I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
