So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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