I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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