marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
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