Having a random hookup so left but love u
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
