What did we do last night that was yellow?
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
