And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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