no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
