Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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