I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Randomize
