It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
too bad you live with your parents still
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
