You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
