i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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