The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
