she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
