Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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