So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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