she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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