Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
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