the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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