I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Randomize
