I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Randomize
