Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
