my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
