There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
