Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
