so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize
