Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
