Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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