dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
