why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
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