plz talk dirty to me
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
