Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
So squirting runs in the family.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
