I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
