The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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