I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
