All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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