dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
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