everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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