The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
