Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize
