We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
now i know why i became what i already was.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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