2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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