Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
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