I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Randomize
