i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
