Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
