You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
