is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
