i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
